HAPPY NURSE'S WEEK!

I thought that in honor of nurse's week, I would take a moment and describe what the last 20 years of my life in nursing has afforded me.  I have been lifted up, molded and changed by my service to my fellow man.

So let me share what it has meant to me, what I have learned:

• Before I ever had a child of my own, I learned DON'T WAKE A SLEEPING BABY!
• A blood pressure cuff squeezing a limb off--an infant will sleep through this.
• The "beep-beep-beep" of a thermometer? Not so much.
• If you take the diaper off of a baby, they will pee, poo and stick their foot in it.  (I learned this as a new mom, too.)
• If you start an IV over clean sheets, there will be 2 drops of blood that fall.
• If you remove an IV from a 3 year old, and their mother is wearing a white shirt, it is inevitable that the arm will get away from you and soon, Mom will look like a murder victim
• When you give Morphine for pain, then Morphine, then Morphine and then Valium....well, artificial ventilation is going to be in your and your patient's future.
• Artificial ventilation is preferable to screaming.
• Doctors, bless them, do not understand pain like nurses do.
• A good nurse will hound, harass and stalk a physician to get an order for pain meds for your child.
• It is a lot harder to get to all 4 ER patients in one hour than one would think.
• I have learned that truth really is stranger than fiction.
• However, some true stories are truly boring.  So if you cut your arm on a broken window, I will help you concoct a story that involves swarthy pirates, fair maidens, a sword fight, nearly walking the plank and defeating the enemy. I will rehearse this with you, so when you return to school, you might entertain/lie to your friends and get a laugh from your injury.
• I have also discovered that a warm blanket is almost as effective as Morphine.
• If you have chest pain and you come to the ER, you are likely going to be there for 6 hours.
• Come to the ER if you have chest pain. Period.
• Most of my advice and knowledge is inappropriate for dinner table conversation.
• Some of the kindest women (and men!) I have ever met are nurses.
• Some of the funniest women (and men!) I have ever met are nurses.
• Some of my best friends, women who held my hand through pregnancies, children, crappy shifts with too many patients, days when patients received bad news, and even died, are nurses.
• Some of the smartest people I know are nurses.

This is really just an off-the-top-of-my-head list.  What I have really learned in 20 years, is to make people laugh when they are stressed.  And when no humor at all is appropriate.  And when to hug a total stranger.  And when to tell someone to stop smoking. And then tell them that they really can beat it, and DON'T EVER GIVE UP!  And when to hold someone's hand and tell them, "I am so glad you came here today. I am glad you didn't hurt yourself.  We can get you help."  I have learned to tell new moms what a great job they are doing. And old dads why it was okay that he called the police and reported his son's drug abuse.

Truly, being a nurse is like LIFE LESSONS 101.  The class continues all through graduate level course work.  How do I tell a patient that their surgery didn't work?  What do I say to the teenage boy who is crying over the loss of his foot?  Well, the former, I hold their hand and just answer honestly and say I am sorry.  The latter? I say nothing, hold his hand and cry with him.  Then I tell him that he will be the Bionic Man and I will be his cheerleader.  Then I give him more pain medicine and he sleeps and I cry a little bit more.

I have learned to be bold in my love for others.  I have learned to just say what I am thinking.  Kind words that this person might need to hear.  Might not hear.  Might never hear again.  I have learned to truly Carpe Diem. 

I have watched as brave men, women and children have faced their mortality.  Some have come off conquerors.  Others have lost their earthly fight.  I have been astounded by the strength that they find, deep, deep inside, just as they need it.

I joke about my job.  I make light that "I am going to save lives today, what are you doing?"  But being a nurse was a calling to me. I knew from the time I was 6 years old that this would be the way that I would spend my life.  The reality has been so much more interesting and rewarding than the dream.

I am thankful that I am a nurse.